I'm confused and a little hurt?

Ok so in December I got in a relationship with a 24 year old man he told me he had a son which I was 100% ok with he told me the baby's mother ran off so I get kind of bad for him. Then in January he tells me he is married still, lives with his wife, and is having a baby. So I was pissed at him and stopped talking to him for a while. During the time we weren't 'together' I started a relationship with another man which I ended quickly because he was a jerk but anyway. Somehome I ended up goin back to the married guy. He had his baby and he filed for divorce. A little while after that I thought I was pregnant and I slightly came to my senses and told him we couldn't be together until he was 100% divorced. During that time I met another guy. I slept with him (which was completely an accident) I told 'married guy' about it and apologized a million times and he basically called me a and hasn't spoken to me in a while. I don't understand how he can be mad at me for an accident but im not allowed to have any feeling towards him, save for understanding, even though he told me a deliberate lie. Incant stop thinking about it and I really want to move on and forget about him but it's hard because I really liked him and was starting to love him (I actually think I do but I don't know). Anyway when all of this started I was 17 I'm 18 now. I feel like i should be mature about this all but it is incredibly hard. What do you all think? Am I really a ? Sorry i wrote so much and sorry If it doesn't make much sense but thank you for any advise or help you can offer.